The Anglo-Saxon Kingdoms

(History Notes!)

I'd wear it.

I’d wear it.

(England; c. 450-1056AD)

Angles, Saxons, and Jutes; modern identity of England comes from belief of these descendants.

A) Adventus Saxonum- Arrival of the Saxons

B) The “Heptarchy” (8 kingdoms) and The Bretwaldas

  • Kent, Mercia, and Northumbria
  • Had a period there where king had authority over England
  • Buttt for the most part….fighting.

C) Offa = badass.

Cerdic begets Cynegils who begets like 6 other children but the 5th in line is all “Fsck you, I should be king!” /monarchy

D) Capitals and Wics

  • Kings live in cities, a capital.
  • Have them Bishops under control, ya’ll.
  • WICS: Trading Emporia. Good trading posts, international.

-Didn’t have bishop, not steady urban population.

-Self governing.

E) 597AD, Gregory I’s mission to cure the heathens. Anglos need to be converted to Christianity!

  • Sends monk Augustine to convert. (Rome)
  • Talks to King of Kent to establish church.

-Kent converts, orders people to convert to his church.

  • ???? PROFIT!

-Gregory I: “Congrats! You’re bishop of the English church now!”

-Augustine: “What the hell do I do now?”

  • !! Bishop of England answers to bishop of Rome!

-POPE! (The origin of idea)

F) Ireland: Converted under St. Patrick.

  • Fawk the Pope, what is that noise.
  • Interest in converting.

Kings and Their Mistresses

As Caroline had feared, Henrietta was replaced by younger, prettier, more manipulating mistresses. Dying from an umbilical rupture in 1737, wrapped in towels as her intestines spilled out, the queen, sensible to the end, suggested that George remarry. But the king, heartbroken, hovering near her bed in her last agonizing moments, swore he would have only mistresses and never remarry.

“Oh, my God!” the dying queen said in French, with characteristic practicality, “that won’t make any difference!”

-Excerpt from Sex with Kings by Eleanor Herman. Famous last words of Queen Caroline to her gallivanting husband King George II of England.